Nana’s Way

Oh, bless your heart. You were really hoping for Nana’s Way, weren’t you? Well, let us paint you a picture:

First, Nana shows up (late, because “traffic was just awful”), armed with a mop that’s older than you and a bottle of mystery cleaner that smells suspiciously like a mix of vinegar, bleach, and regret. She’ll spend the first 20 minutes telling you how much dirt she used to clean back in her day—without all these fancy products—before finally getting started.

Your baseboards? Oh, they’ll get scrubbed… but not before you hear a 30-minute lecture on how “kids these days just don’t clean like they used to.” Your countertops? Sure, they’ll be wiped—right after Nana clears them off and rearranges everything in a way that “makes more sense” (good luck finding your toaster).

And if you dare try to help? Prepare for the wrath of Nana. You’ll get the classic, “Just sit down, you’re in my way!” followed immediately by, “You know, a little help around here wouldn’t hurt.”

Oh, and one last thing—once Nana’s done, she’ll absolutely refuse to take your money, but will accept payment in the form of you sitting down to hear about her bunions and why no one calls her anymore.

So, while we love a deep clean, we regret to inform you that Nana’s Way is unavailable… forever. Trust us—it’s for your own good. 😆